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drugs tearing the family apart.

Posted by Raelynn on 13 March 2016.

My brother has been taking amphetamines for atleast a couple of years now. He's 29 and it is causing the family to fall apart. We're at a loss as to what to do. He's on house arrest at the moment. He lives with my parents and 3 other brothers. I no longer live there and I'm finding it difficult myself to put up with what he is putting the rest of my family through, so I cant imagine what they are going through living with him. Its like walking on egg shells. 

He becomes very violent and seems to "have it in" for my dad and my eldest brother (who i also suspect is on something but doesnt show as obvious signs.) When he gets violent he smashes up the house. Hes broke mugs, windows, doors etc...anything he gets his hands on. He goes for my dad, who would never do anything to hurt his son but understandably it is getting very hard for my dad to control himself and not hit him back, all he can do is restrain him when he's like it. The other night my brother head butted him when he was only trying to help. 

As for my eldest brother and him - they're awful. They fight and argue which means my dad has to step in and break them up, which causes more conflict between everyone. All this goes on around my 15 year old brother. The police have been called and they've said if he has another episode like this then they are going to have to get Social Services involved because of the welfare of my 15 year old brother - who shouldn't have to put up with this from his older brothers! But of course, we don't want 15 year old to be taken away...

We're all at a loss. Where do we even start to try to help when we feel we've done everything? He doesn't want help so no one will help us. He hears voices, tries to hurt himself, smashes the place up, tries to hurt my dad and older brother and just is forever making the house an awkward place to be. I just wish I knew how to help. I feel so lost. Surely this isn't what we have to go through forever??


Icarus Trust
22 Mar 2016

Hi Raelynn
It sounds like you are having to cope with a lot at the moment. It must be very worrying for you. Maybe you would like to talk to someone who understands what you are having to deal with and may be able to help you find a way forward for yourself as well as the rest of your family. 
I work for a charity called The Icarus Trust that supports the families and friends of addicts. We have experienced trained volunteers called Family Friends who you could talk with. They could also signpost you to other help that is available.
You can contact us on or visit the website
I hope that you are able to find some support. Good luck!

10 Jun 2016

Thank you for sharing your story.

It seems there are few services and research done considering the experience of family members, in particular siblings. That is why I am conducting a research project looking at the narratives of siblings, encouraging others like you to share their experiences. If you wish to participate and share your story or would like more information please contact me at Thank you.

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