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A place for families, because you don't have to use drugs to be affected by them.

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How do I let go?

Posted by Amy1210 on 2 November 2017.

My partner has issues with his mental health, and as a result addiction. In the time we have been together he has relapsed on heroin, and in the process of recovery has sporadically had episodes of heavy drinking. His lapses are scary, and usually happen when I least expect them, I'll go to work and everything will be fine and come back to find him drunk, covered in sick or self-harming. He is a very intelligent, articulate person and is also very good at lying. Although things have been good for a while now, and he seems to be moving on with his life, I feel like I live in a permanent state of fear and paranoia, and I worry that my behaviour and monitoring of him is becoming controlling, but I don't know what else to do. I love him so much and I want more than anything to just give him back some independence, and to live a happy, normal life. Any suggestions on how I can learn to trust again?


Icarus Trust
17 Nov 2017

Hi Amy,

I am so sorry to read your post and sad that the situation has made you fearful. If you would like to get some support for yourself from people who would understand exactly how you are feeling, please contact The Icarus Trust. We are a charity that offers support to people who are dealing with the addictive behaviours of a family member or friend.
You can contact us on or visit the website
I hope that this may help.

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