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Living next to a alcoholic

Posted by Bananacake on 2 January 2017.

Hi, so I live in Hertfordshire, need some advice. Since August 2016 I have been living next to a alcoholic. When he drinks he is volient, has very distressing mental health episodes, is a very heavy smoker (the communal hallway smells, his bedroom backs on to mine and it has started to come through the wall), plays very loud music, and has recently been arrested for class a drugs, rape and something else. From what I know he has come from DENS and has 2/3 friends that seem to like slamming the doors and staying over. I have tried to be a good neighbour, I've offered him as much support as I can, I've even called druglink out for him when he was in a manic episode. He has been hospitalised once, the police have been round, he has been told if he has one more drink he will die, but he keeps drinking. He knocks at my door, constantly texts, well I've now had enough. So I wrote him a note to say I can no longer help, he needs professional help and needs to accept it. I have contacted the council several times, filled in the record, they have written to him, it has made very little difference. It's got to the point I have had to temp move out again (I moved out a couple of months ago, and when he went in to hospital it was lovely to get quiet and sleep). I've been in hospital from 23rd to 29th December as I've been ill, and I've been to scared to return home since, staying with relatives. It's got to a point, that I don't know what to do, im tried and simply scared in my own home. Im not sure about his court dates, but when you have listened to it happen through the walls. I've written to my councillor, and also filled in the at risk form over the weekend. To add to situation, I am 25, I have autism and struggle with sensory and noise as it is, so this is a trigger making my condition worse. It is affecting me at work, as I'm so tired. I can't yet bring myself to go home. How do I gone on to deal with it on a daily basis? Does it get better? Worse of all I can't bring myself to tell my dad, as I feel though I'm failing to be independent. Thank you


Adfam Administrator
12 Jan 2017

Hi Bananacake,
Thank you for sharing your story, and we are sorry to hear about the difficult situation you find yourself in. We would always suggest that if you ever feel that your safety is at risk you should contact the police. 

Also, you can contact Hertfordshire County Council Adult Care Services on 0300 123 4042

Best wishes,

Icarus Trust
16 Jan 2017

Hi Bananacake,

So sorry to read your story and to see how difficult it is for you to be in your own home at the moment. This must be very stressful for you. If you need to talk with anyone The Icarus Trust is a charity that supports friends and family of addicts. Please contact us if you think it would help to talk with people who understand what you are going through.
You can contact us on or visit the website
Wishing you all the best.

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