We care, for the better.
A place for families, because you don't have to use drugs to be affected by them.
- How do I know if they're using drugs?
- Why do they use drugs/alcohol?
- Is it my fault?
- How can I cope with their behaviour?
- Understanding the stages of addiction and recovery
- Where do I get the help I need?
- Getting support for your loved one
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Nearly ready to give up...
Posted by Near the end on 22 August 2016.
Hi, please please please can someone help me.. I'm desparate and I've no where else to turn to.. I've been with my partner for 2 and a half years and his drink and drug use is now completely out of control. I don't know how much more I can take. It started off with him going missing at weekends when we first met and I thought he was just a bit of a jack the lad, the more I fell in love with him the harder it has become to walk away. His drug use is frequent and regular and he sometimes will go missing for up to five days, switching his phone off and not turning into work or contacting anyone. His finances are out of control as he is struggling to keep up with paying £500 a weekend on drugs and drink.. When he comes home, he can be extremely aggressive to the point that we have had the police around for domestic violence. The lies he tells to cover up his drug use is getting so bad I can't believe anything he tells me. He tells everyone that it's me who has the problem to deter the attention away from himself. Every special occasion anniversary, Valentine's, all family members birthdays, my birthdays, his own birthdays and Christmas's that have come and gone since we have been together have been ruined by drug use as all our plans are never important enough to come first, he will always disappear for days on end with no contact. I've had drug dealers come round the house, people kicking my door in early hours, people threatening to come to my work and hurt me and I've stood by my boyfriend all the way to hell and protect him but yet he will still put me at danger and risk of these people. I've tried organising things to keep him occupied like joining the gym, booking events away from the area and holidays but it's all money I can't afford because he never shows up or we don't go because he goes missing. His family have had this for 8 years and it's destroyed their lives.. He is a lovely person inside but when drink and drugs take control, he is irrational, unreasonable, violent and deluded of why is reality and what isn't. I can't cope with the emotional, physical strain anymore. I spend every waking moment scared and having to think ahead to avoid him going off on a binge but i can't cope anymore. I've tried counselling, hypnotherapy and police help but he doesn't seem to change and it still happens, one time he did it every day for about 7 months and he got sacked from his work. He has a new job but has had two warnings for not turning in or calling anyone and going off in work time without informing anyone. He turns into work under the influence and it's become a massive problem in both our lives.. I have thought of ending things myself because no end of help seems to get me anywhere and I really need to know where I can go to get help, not just for him but for myself too before I have a nervous breakdown with it all.. Someone please help me or please provide some guidance on where I can get help and support from.
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